First, disaster
We are currently on a very bad path in the US. Many of you live in the US just like me, but many of you are not. But as they say, “If America sneezes, the rest of the world will be cold.” What happens here affects the whole world. Many people outside the US are worried, worried, and disappointed. In some cases, they see the rise of politicians and voters inspired by what is going on here.
I am not going to detail the disaster. Please mention that it is not normal to grab people from the street, from hospital, or from hospital, while refusing to display their ID or provide warrants. It is not normal for the government to send people abroad to concentration camps where they are tortured, and they do not want to be free. It is not normal for the highest courts on the land to make this possible.
It’s not normal what’s going on. That is a disaster. It is the collapse of democratic norms. Usually we relied on elections to drive us out of the disaster caused by government actions. But much of what’s happening now is illegal and criminal governments are generally not open to being removed from power.
Things are tough, and the most Grimm part is that this is just beginning. It is almost guaranteed that there will be far worse things going forward.
Plus, we all have difficulties dealing with aging spouse, troublesome divorce, difficulties in achieving our goals, uncertainty about our health.
There’s a lot to deal with.
Next, thank you
I do not suggest that gratitude will overthrow the authoritarian regime, or stop masked men from luring people on the streets or restoring democracy. But I would suggest that it can help us to maintain a more emotional balance.
The worst thing we can do is to be hopeless and discouraged, thinking that things will never get better. Optimism is needed. It’s a positive optimism of confidence, not a toxic optimism of assuming things aren’t that bad and something even worse won’t happen. We need to have faith that there is something worth fighting for.
Some people want us to feel fearful, traumatic, and hopeless, as they make it easier to achieve the evil deeds they are set up. Finding joy and optimism is an act of resistance. Creating emotional resilience is an act of resistance.
As an image, someone has recently been sharing it in the Wild Mind community. “You care deeply about injustice, suffering, and ecological destruction, so if you feel it heavy, don’t forget that a trillion dollar propaganda machine was built to paralyze you and that didn’t work on you.”
The same can be said about the destruction of democracy and the rule of law.
Thanks is helpful.
Even in normal times, our minds tend to focus on what we dislike – not going to the wrong, or what we want to go to, the people who bother us, events that disappoint us, etc. We also tend to take the obvious good things, forgetting that most of our lives are actually going well. These trends are endemic and evolutionary psychologists say that by helping us avoid danger, they helped our species survive. But in modern times, our main problem is not usually to avoid danger. I’m learning to be safe, happy, and create and maintain loving connections with others.
Thanksgiving gives us a break from becoming obsessed with what is wrong and brings attention to what is going right. I have a practice of sitting down every morning and writing down (at least) five things I’m grateful for. They are often small. This morning I was grateful for the joy that came from learning from a kind and clever person in my dreams, texting from my teenage son, healing injuries (and at least not worsened), and the simplification of my possessions and making sure that I have a home.
The secret is to avoid letting these things stay still in the route, but stick to each one. I describe this as “holding each in my mind until I feel the goodness of it.” In other words, I take good things in my life. I’ll think about it for a while. I might make it lie in my heart. Or maybe I imagine what life would look like without it. Usually, after just a few seconds, I begin to feel a sparkle of warm joy. That’s what I call “feeling good.”
This is the opposite of making good things the norm. That’s the opposite of living in a negative way. And it has the opposite effect of those things. It doesn’t drag me down, it raises me. It doesn’t make me feel dissatisfied and critical, it gives me joy.
Another secret is not to see my morning gratitude practice as all of my gratitude. It’s a gentle reminder at the beginning of a day that’s in the direction I want to move. I want to be more grateful. I want to rejoice in the smallest things in life. And I remind myself to continue to go back to gratitude all day.
I often pause and appreciate the little things, as if the leaves are blowing in the wind, the sewers exist, and there are shops just below the road where you can buy the food you need. This brings joy to life. It changes the structure of the brain itself. It changes who we are.
(Please join me here.
To survive these difficult times, we need joy and gratitude.
Rebecca Solnit points out that there is love under our rage.
If we’re just mad, we’re playing games similar to authoritarians. You need to see what’s good and stay in touch with it. This requires practice.
“When you’re afraid, all you’re thinking is what you’re afraid of,” says Arash Javabakht, a psychiatrist and neuroscientist at Wayne State University. He also points out that even simple things like science, art, sports, etc. need to balance the bad things we hear.
There’s a time when this is over. Maybe they won’t rig the election enough. There will probably be a massive, non-violent uprising. In the meantime:
I am grateful for the truth in a time of lies. I am grateful for the connection in an age of division. In an age of condemnation, we recognize and celebrate the goodness of others. Above all, be grateful that love continues in an age of hatred. Please show it to others. Give them support and encouragement.
“We’re together,” as lawyer and commentator Joyce Vance likes to sign off.
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