How did you and me create a beautiful friendship?

How did you and me create a beautiful friendship?

When my ex -wife and I separated in 1999 and divorced two years later, we never imagined that we would spend one week as a friend.

Our life has rarely intersected for the past quarter century, but except for the date of divorce and the wedding of the daughter in 2012. I brought us here.

It was not just nostalgic. It was excavation. In our week, our 20 -year -old memory is not a tie that has connected us, but a focus on the fracture that separates us, and is distorted over time. I noticed that I was.

Through conversation, we started to solve memories from young people. She reminded me of the nine months when we lived with my father after we signed a contract in the first year of the university. Her story filled the lack of a shortage and added a new depth to my memories.

In addition, we revisited the challenges and events that both of us experienced together. At the moment of joy, struggle, and growth, we were forming us in a way that we did not fully understand at the time. Time and distance became clear in a way that could not be connected together with these moments.

For me, the first step in friendship came three years ago. I needed permission to reconstruct an old pension, but it needed a detailed financial contract. I sent her a cautious proposal. Her quick response was a mistake I missed, but what was outstanding was her immediate guarantee: “I implicitly trust you.”

At that moment -her trust is very free and stops the world. It showed the beginning of a slow rebuilding of mutual respect, once a cornerstone of our relationship.

Since then, life has been connecting us in an unexpected way. Two years ago, our daughter called for economic help. I was a person who reached my mother on behalf of my daughter. The conversation was more than 10 years in the first conversation, and I felt like opening the door that was too long and closed.

Recently, I was there to support her through the end of a long -term relationship with my father’s death. In order, she processed my second marriage and listened when I found my foothold in a new relationship.

This week, I felt like we’ve done the tile BLE of the collapsed house and discovered that the foundation was still solid. We both talked about how to change, the lessons learned from the failed relationships, and the new perceptions accompanied by time.

When we helped to handle our shared past, we lay down to rest the ghosts that no one could get rid of for us. These were the moment we could give each other. Now I have a tool and perspective I understand.

I realized that healing is not always a closure. In many cases, find a new way to hold the past with compassion. It is a pattern that falls into many of us. Instead of dealing with reality, things will be improved. It is not easy to recognize this yourself, but it can be the first step for real life.

At the age of 63, I began to see my life is not black and white. It exists in the gray hue. Regardless of marriage or friendship, all relationships are rarely good or bad. I am very grateful for what we shared with young people, the growth we have achieved, and the opportunity to rediscover the friendship under all of them.

Remembering with my best friend in front of me was a gift. As the age passes, those who share our early chapters will further important these connections, not as a link to our past, but reminding us of how far we have come. These shared history remind you of who we are, understand who we have become, and fix us in a way to feel irreplaceable.

We are already planning the next chapter of this friendship. She immediately visits me to the United States and meets my current partner. Definitely, I will spend more time when I am in the UK. What we create is not just a rediscovered connection. It is a living and evolving bond that will move us.

Sometimes healing does not mean repairing something broken in the original state. Instead, it means removing the collapsed and finding something new in that place. It is a friendship that can withstand the trials of time.

When we clean our past tile BLE, I have found a friendship that can withstand. If you find the courage to start, how many of our people will find the same?

About Robert M. Ford

Robert M Ford is a fiction, essay, poetry writer, and explores his family, memory, and connections to form us. His work has appeared in anthology, literary magazines, and online platforms. Originally from the UK, he currently lives in St. Petersburg, Florida, where he shares his family, writing, his sub -sacks, a fragile scenery, and his blog. 。 His debut novel “Holding on” will leave later this year.

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