When you think of suffering, what comes to mind?
Perhaps you imagine the grief of losing someone or the physical pain of an injury.
But what about how we struggle with the complexities of the modern world?
According to Buddhist monk Nick Keomahavong, one of the causes of suffering in modern society is that our lives are too complex.
These days, we have to jump through hoops to maintain important parts of our lives. Trying to find a new doctor, figure out how much you pay in taxes, and contact the DMV can feel like rocket science.
It makes me wonder why we allow such complications in the first place. Is it possible to make life easier for yourself?
Why is life so complicated?
From false promises of ease to self-optimization, here are some reasons why life can feel so complicated.
Reason 1: False promises of simplicity
How many times have you bought something that promised to make your life easier, only to end up gathering dust in the back of your cupboard?
You may have been fooled by the following guarantees:
“Use this cream and your skin will improve in 7 days.”
“This book alone will change your life.”
“This water bottle will make your life better than any other water bottle.”
We buy things that promise to make our lives easier, but trying to manage them all makes life even more complicated.
Moreover, presenting too many options can paralyze the analysis. An electric kettle will probably make your life easier, but you’ll have to decide which one to buy out of 100 different options.
To avoid false promises of ease, we need to be more conscious of what we consume, what we buy, what we listen to, and what we work on.
Unfortunately, modern society makes this very difficult. We must always think about what we are consuming. Which brings me to my next point.
Reason 2: Mental burden
Author Carla Starr talks about the complexities of the modern world that make life inconvenient. she says:
“It’s not just work that’s messy and tiring, it’s home life, paying the bills and getting groceries (…) It’s climate change, disconnecting the air conditioner in March, traveling because of the hurricane. “I remember carrying bags in the car, paying $5 for celery, forgetting my frequent flyer card, managing parental controls on electronic devices,” she said. And reading conflicting studies about everything I’ve ever eaten. ”
Mental load is the “thinking” work you do every day to keep things going. This is often used to describe the idea of running a household, a burden that often falls on women’s shoulders.
Mental load is having to think about a to-do list in your head, write it down on paper, and then do the tasks on the to-do list. Meanwhile, something else is going on in your head at the same time, creating another to-do list.
We all experience this mental heaviness in one way or another, and it’s exhausting because it never really ends. Thinking about things before you try to do something can drain your energy.
So what’s the solution?
Some may say that you need to organize your life to make things easier. Tiago Forte’s Second Brain, which outsources everything in your head to a digital database, is an example of organizing your life.
While this may be helpful, there is one more thing to consider. Surely our brains should be able to catch up on their own? Or maybe it’s a sign that it’s too much.
Reason 3: Optimizing the human experience
On the subject of organizing our lives, we are also told to optimize every aspect of the human experience.
Author Anne Helen Petersen writes:
“Domestic work is now supposed to tick an endless number of aspirational boxes: going out should be an ‘experience’, food should be healthy, homemade and enjoyable; The body should be in shape, wrinkles should be minimized, clothes should be cute and fashionable, sleep should be regulated, relationships should be healthy, the news should not be read. should be processed. ”
If everything isn’t “supposed” to be the best, you won’t be able to enjoy life to the fullest.
You’ve probably heard of the term “biohacking.” This means using light therapy, supplements, fitness trackers, etc. to improve your physical or mental performance. Rather than spending time in the sun, you can “hack” your system by holding a lightbox to your face.
When trying to optimize your life, you often come across conflicting information. One health expert may say bananas are good for your health, while another health expert may say bananas are bad for your metabolism. This only makes life seem more complicated.
The real problem when trying to optimize the human experience is that all problems need to be solved quickly.
But is the goal really to eliminate problems? What if you could find a way to enjoy life without changing every aspect of your life?
Perhaps with this mindset, you won’t accumulate so much stuff that it overwhelms your brain and shames you for not living a “perfect” life.
How to make life less complicated
If you’re suffering because of life’s complexity, how can you make your life a little simpler? Here are some options to ease the burden you may be feeling.
Don’t save it, lose it.
Although we are told to focus on what we want and pursue it at all costs, there are many benefits to letting go.
In order to get what you want, you need to make space for it in your life. This may involve letting go of things you thought you needed.
The obvious place to start is with physical items, but you also need to clear your mental and emotional space (through meditation, therapy, or journaling).
Read next: How to let go of what no longer serves you
Close the open loop.
An open loop is an unfinished commitment. It’s basically when you know you need to do something, but it’s still spinning around in your head. Closing open loops reduces mental load. If you want to learn more, I wrote about this concept here.
To close open loops, start by identifying the one thing that’s stuck in the back of your mind. Do you have nagging thoughts that are draining your energy (mentally, physically, or emotionally)? Decide in the next 24 hours whether you can eliminate it from your headspace or deal with it.
Take a break from the online world.
The internet and social media play a huge role in the complexity of our daily lives. Although they offer us many benefits, they are also addictive and prevent us from scrolling through other people’s thoughts and ideas.
Return to yourself often so you don’t waste time in a false reality. Take some quiet time, go offline once a week, or try a new hobby that doesn’t require scrolling.
Focus on the simple things.
Life is and always will be complex, but that doesn’t mean certain aspects of life aren’t easy. If there is one thing in your life that feels easy, express your gratitude for it.
Perhaps you are grateful for things that come to mind easily, for relationships that feel uncomplicated, or for the sun to shine every day without you having to do anything.
What would make your life simpler?
I hope this post has made you feel a little better about the complexities of modern life. We often beat ourselves up for not being able to “catch up”, but the world today is simply not designed to be that way.
Please note that not all problems need to be resolved immediately. The goal is not to live a problem-free life, but to find a way to enjoy life despite the problems.
